


Two player game

by Theinsanelycoolmichaelmell



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst, Cutting, Fluff, M/M, One Shot, Self Harm, flangst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-16
Updated: 2018-06-16
Packaged: 2019-05-24 05:46:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14948693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theinsanelycoolmichaelmell/pseuds/Theinsanelycoolmichaelmell
Summary: Michael spirals out of control after the events of the party.





	Two player game

"Get out of my way, loser."

those words repeated relentlessly in Michaels brain. Part of him wanted to be angry. How dare Jeremy just push him aside like he was just some stranger? like they haven't been friends for 12 years? Like he meant absolutely nothing to him? A larger part of Michael knew that this was bound to happen. Sooner or later Jeremy would become tired of having to support a freak like him. He honestly didn't know how Jeremy put up with him for so long. Michael rubbed at his face in a fit of frustration. Loser. he never loved you. How could anyone even like you? pathetic. Freak. Michael pushed his head into his pillow as he tried to block out the noises in his head. Before he knew it he was crying, salty tears streamed down his cheeks as his throat threatened to shut. In a desperate attempt to calm himself down, he picked up his phone and called Jeremy. 

Ring ring ri-

straight to voicemail. Michael didnt know what he was expecting. He clutched his blanket in his fists as he shook even harder. The sobs were louder now, coming in heavy waves as he wondered why the hell he was still alive.Leaving his phone on the bed, he finally worked up enough courage to walk over to his bathroom. Michael pulled out his shaving razor from the cabinet and began to fiddle with it. contemplating.

Just do it already. Who would miss you? certainly not Jeremy.

Michael threw the razor on the ground, and without a second thought he stomped on it. Carefully he removed the razor from the broken casing and brought it to his tanned skin. He hesitated slightly before turning it to create a vertical path down to his forearm. Michael pressed the razor deep into his skin. He wanted to feel it. He knew he deserved it. This is what freaks like him were born for. To hurt and to service others. Michael saw the blood drip down his arm and watched as it began to pool on the floor. He felt relieved, even if just for a moment. Michael began to feel lightheaded so he crumpled to the floor as the pain in his arm became worse. In the distance he heard his cellphone buzz but he was to preoccupied to care. 'Probably just some stupid instagram notification. why would it be anyone else?' He thought bitterly.

Missed call from player two

(2)Missed calls from player two

Voicemail from player two

Text message from player two: Michael? Please answer me! 

Text message: Michael please!

Text message: I'm so sorry Micah.. I  don't even know where to begin.

Text message: Micah if you don't answer me I'm coming over.

Text message: I'm on my way.. God i hope you're okay..

Michael was pulled out of the trance the blood put him in and began to start on his other arm. He swiped swiftly down his forearm to create a similar jagged cut. He watched as the new cut began to bead with blood. Before he knew it the cut was gushing onto the floor, matching the speed of the previous one. Michael closed his eyes and just waited for himself to bleed out. 

'Now Jeremy wont have to deal with a disgusting freak like you'  was the last thing michael thought, before he heard someone come in downstairs. He was too far gone to care though, so he just sat there waiting for the inevitable.

"Micahhhh? Micah where are you?"

No response.

Jeremy practically sprinted up the stairs towards Michaels room, but then he stopped dead in his tracks. 

'is that blood?' Jeremy thought as he made his way to the bathroom. What he saw next made him drop to his knees. There, laying on the floor was Michael, his Michael, with deep gashes in his arms and a razor in his hand. Jeremy felt his stomach sink as he tried to process what he was seeing. The tall boy made his way over to Michael and took the razor out of his hand. 

"Micah? can you hear me?" Jeremy asked as he pulled michael onto the rim of the bathtub. Michaels eyes fluttered open. 

"Go away. I'm just a loser remember? Don't have to waste your time on me." Those words hit Jeremy like a bag of bricks.

"I'm not going anywhere, I cant believe i let this happen. You don't deserve this Micah not any of it."

"It hurts Jere, everything hurts so much.. I-I'm sorry."  

"Micah please save your strength okay? you don't have to apologize, we have to get you cleaned up."

Jeremy reached into the cabinet and pulled out the alcohol and gauze bandages. He softly reached for one of the shorter boys arms.

"Micah this is going to sting a little but you have to let me do this okay?"

Michael only nodded softly. Jeremy began to dab the cut lightly and Michael immediately flinched, trying to retract his arm from Jeremys hold. Jeremy tightened his grip slightly and made quick work of wrapping Michaels arm in a bandage. He then grabbed the other boys other arm before he could protest, and gave it the same treatment. He slowly brought Michael to his feet and guided him to his bedroom. 

"Jere.. are you gonna leave me here?" he asked sadly.

"not now, not ever." Came Jeremys reply.

"I-Im sorry I just-" Michaels voice cracked as tears threatened to spill.

"shh now. Everything is going to be okay, love. We can talk about it in the morning."

Michael thought for a moment but he knew Jeremy was just trying to do what was best for him. He settled down and allowed Jeremy to wrap his arms around him as they cuddled in the bed. Michael pressed himself into Jeremys chest. He finally felt calm. A feeling he hasn't felt for months. The last thing he remembers is Jeremy pressing a gentle kiss on his forehead and then falling asleep.

*Time skip to the next morning*

Michael was the first of the pair to wake up. He noticed the pale arms that were wrapped protectively around his waist. He also noticed his arms, now bandaged and aching dully. He laid there for a minute processing the situation. 

'what the hell did i do? what did i get us into? how did he even get here? why does he even care-'

Michaels thoughts were cut off by Jeremy shifting in the bed. Jeremy sat up and motioned for Michael to do the same. Michael complied and sat closer to Jeremy. Jeremy took his hand and laced their fingers together as he thought for a moment, trying to find the right words to say.

"Micah, I don't know where to start.. I need you to know that everything i said that night at the party? I didn't mean it. Any of it. The truth is, the Squip was forcing me to do and say all of those things. I know that doesn't make it right, but i need you to know how sorry I truly am."

Michael took a moment to think about everything Jeremy had said. 

"Jere i know now that it was the squip but I cant just forget about it. It hurt so much. You and I were always together, player one and two and then you left and i had no idea what to do.."

Jeremy's face switched through so many emotions at once. Sadness then guilt then pain.

"Micah I will promise you right here and right now, that I will never leave you like that again. I care about you too much. You dont understand how much it physically hurt me to see you do that to yourself. But to know I caused it hurts the most.."

"How could you care so much about a stupid freak like me?" Michael questioned almost too softly for Jeremy to hear.

"Micah look at me." Jeremy said as he took his free hand to tilt michaels chin upward.

"You are by no stretch of imagination, a freak. You are so perfect. You are literally everything to me and i guess i just never knew how to tell you that.. I guess what I'm trying to say here is that i uh.. I love you."

Michael could not believe the words he was hearing. The words he waited for so long, the words that gave him hope.

" I love you too, Jere-bear. I just never knew how to tell you either. But what about Christine?"

"Honestly, I was just trying to project my feelings for you onto her. I didnt want to complicate things or make you hate me.." 

It was Michaels turn to comfort his love now.

"Jere literally nothing you could ever do would make me hate you.. Unless you wanna fuck dogs or stop playing video games with me Im pretty sure everything else is fine."

"Only you Micah only you." Both boys irrupted into a fit of laughter. Michael retracted his hand from Jeremy's only to wrap both of his arms around the taller boys neck. Jeremy shifted instantly and allowed Michael to climb into his lap.

"You know that you, are my favorite person.."

" Is it really true, Im your favowite personnn" Michael made sure to draw out the person part as a smirk appeared on his lips. Jeremy rolled his eyes playfully.

"Yeah, we're never not gonna be a team." It was Jeremys turn to smile, he opted for a big toothy grin.

 They stayed staring at each other for a while, neither boy wanting to move any time soon. With a sudden burst of confidence, Michael put his hand on Jeremys cheek and pulled him closer. Without a second thought, he closed the gap and pulled Jeremy into a sweet kiss. Jeremy was quick to reciprocate and tilted his head slightly so he could give Michael better access. The two boys stayed like this for a couple of minutes before deciding it was time to pull away.

"That was.. nice- not just nice i mean uh it was great i mean I -" Jeremy stammered

 

" Jere you're spiraling. Its okay, I liked it too ya dork." Michael said lovingly.

"Right.. so uh Breakfast? and video gameessss?" 

"Ready when you are" Michael said as he climbed off Jeremy's lap and and stood up off the bed.

"Yeah okay let me just do this." Jeremy said as he pushed michael back onto the bed and ran out the room.

" FUCK YOU HEERE" Michael shouted as he quickly shot up and ran to get jeremy back.

"Wouldnt you like to" Came Jeremy's response. 

"Yeah yeah maybe after video games" Which actually meant before after and maybe even during  video games to Michael.


End file.
